The Best Dad Jokes to Make Everyone Laugh (or Roll Their Eyes)

Enjoy the Best Dad Jokes, where the puns are always intended, the laughs are guaranteed (or at least a few eye-rolls), and every joke comes with a free side of ‘Dad approval!’ Buckle up for some groan-worthy humor that will make you say, ‘I can’t believe I’m laughing at this!’

Ready or not, here come the dad jokes you never knew you needed!

Best Dad Jokes

1. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!
2. What did one plate say to the other? Lunch is on me.
3. What did the fisherman say to the magician? Pick a cod, any cod!
4. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!
5. What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing, it just waved.
6. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!

If you’re craving more jokes that make you laugh and question your humor taste, our collection of Deez Nuts Jokes is a must-see for ultimate giggles!

Prepare for Giggles with the Best Dad Jokes Ever!

1. Why can’t your nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot!
2. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese!
3. Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up.
4. How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
5. What do you call a man with a rubber toe? Roberto!
6. Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems.

Strap in and buckle up! Our Racing Jokes will leave you speeding through laughter faster than you can say, ‘Start your engines!

Laugh Out Loud with the Best Ever Dad Jokes!

1. How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut.
2. What do you call a factory that makes okay products? A satisfactory.
3. Why do seagulls fly over the ocean? Because if they flew over the bay, they’d be bagels.
4. What did the grape do when it got stepped on? It let out a little wine.
5. Why did the golfer bring extra pants? In case he got a hole in one.
6. What do you call a can opener that doesn’t work? A can’t opener.

Want to master the art of smooth talking? Check out these Rizz Jokes and become the ultimate charmer, one witty line at a time!

Turn Up the Charm with the Best Dad Jokes Flirty Enough to Impress!

1. Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got “fine” written all over you!
2. Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?
3. If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber!
4. Do you have a map? Because I keep getting lost in your eyes.
5. Are you from Tennessee? Because you’re the only ten I see!
6. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put U and I together.

For classic laughs that hit as hard as a 90s comeback, our Yo Mama So Fat Jokes are here to give you a bellyful of hilarity!

Travel the World in Laughter with the Best Foreign Dad Jokes!

1. Why do French people eat snails? Because they don’t like fast food!
2. What’s a British dad’s favorite type of joke? Dry humor, old chap!
3. Why did the Spanish chef throw away his herbs? Because they were past their thyme!
4. What do you call a German dad who’s also a baker? A pretzel papa.
5. Why do Italian dads love puns? Because they’re always pasta-tively funny.
6. How does a Swedish dad start his jokes? With a Smorgasbord of humor!

Giddy up for giggles with our Cowboy Jokes! They’re guaranteed to rope you in and have you laughing ‘til the cows come home.

Timeless Chuckles: The Best Dad Jokes of All Time!

1. What’s brown and sticky? A stick.
2. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
3. What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
4. How does the moon cut his hair? Eclipse it.
5. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh.
6. Why do cows wear bells? Because their horns don’t work.

Go bananas with laughter as our Monkey Jokes swing straight into your funny bone. Just try not to slip on any puns!

Kid-Friendly Comedy: The Best Dad Jokes for Kids!

1. Why was the stadium so cool? Because it was filled with fans!
2. What do you call a snowman in July? A puddle.
3. Why did the teddy bear say “no” to dessert? Because he was stuffed.
4. What did one wall say to the other? I’ll meet you at the corner.
5. What’s a witch’s favorite subject in school? Spelling!
6. Why did the banana go to the doctor? It wasn’t peeling well.

Feeling ’22’ or ready to ‘Shake It Off’? Our Taylor Swift Jokes will have you singing, laughing, and maybe even writing your own breakup song.

Crowned Comedy: The Worlds Best Dad Jokes Revealed!

1. Why did the scarecrow get promoted? Because he was outstanding in his field!
2. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
3. How do you organize a space party? You planet.
4. What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies!
5. How does a taco say grace? Lettuce pray.
6. Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged!

If you need a laugh on a budget, our Yo Momma So Broke Jokes will crack you up without costing a cent!

Sleigh All Day with the Best Christmas Dad Jokes!

1. What do you call Santa when he takes a break? Santa pause.
2. How does a snowman get around? He rides an “icicle.”
3. What does Santa suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney? Claus-trophobia.
4. Why are Christmas trees so bad at knitting? They keep dropping their needles.
5. What do you get if you cross a snowman and a dog? Frostbite.
6. Why did Santa go to music school? To improve his wrapping skills.

Take a shot at our Basketball Jokes that are nothing but net when it comes to delivering laughter. Warning: may cause dribbling (from laughter)!

Unmatched Humor: The Best Dad Jokes in the World!

1. Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
2. What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator!
3. Why did the orange stop? It ran out of juice.
4. Why was the big cat disqualified from the race? Because it was a cheetah.
5. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
6. Why are elevator jokes so good? Because they work on so many levels.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to our Chicken Butt Jokes! They’re egg-cellent and will leave you clucking for more.

Fresh Laughs: The Best New Dad Jokes You Need to Hear!

1. What do you call a line of rabbits hopping backward? A receding hareline.
2. Why did the man put his money in the blender? To make liquid assets.
3. What does a cloud wear under his raincoat? Thunderwear.
4. Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose.
5. What do you call a group of musical whales? An orca-stra.
6. Why did the computer get cold? It left its Windows open.

Ever met someone whose name was just begging for a pun? Our Name Jokes are hilariously creative and perfect for a laugh you won’t forget.

So Bad They’re Good: The Best Bad Dad Jokes Ever!

1. What do you call a belt made of watches? A waist of time!
2. How does a lawyer say goodbye? I’ll be suing ya!
3. Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out.
4. What’s orange and sounds like a bell? A carrot.
5. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.
6. What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.

Turn the week around with Wednesday Jokes so funny, even Hump Day will be rolling with laughter and begging for a Friday encore.

Corny and Proud: The Best Corny Dad Jokes You’ll Love!

1. Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up.
2. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
3. What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
4. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
5. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
6. Why did the music teacher get locked in her classroom? Because her keys were on the piano.

Sometimes humor is the best medicine, and our Cancer Jokes aim to lift your spirits and bring a smile when it’s needed most.

Get Spooked and Amused with the Best Halloween Dad Jokes!

1. Why did the vampire get a job at the bakery? He wanted to earn a little dough.
2. What does a ghost say when it makes a mistake? Boo-boo!
3. Why did the skeleton skip the party? He had no body to dance with.
4. How do you fix a broken jack-o-lantern? With a pumpkin patch.
5. What’s a mummy’s favorite type of music? Wrap music.
6. What do witches ask for at hotels? Broom service.

Get ready to make Nonna laugh out loud (and maybe spill her espresso) with our Jokes for Italians! They’re pasta-tively hilarious!

Festive Fun with the Best Dad Christmas Jokes!

1. What did one snowman say to the other? Do you smell carrots?
2. What’s a Christmas tree’s favorite candy? Orna-mints.
3. Why did the Christmas cookie go to the doctor? It was feeling crumby.
4. How does Santa keep track of all the fireplaces? He uses chimney GPS.
5. What does Rudolph want for Christmas? A sleigh-station.
6. Why are Christmas jokes so good? They sleigh every time.

Brace yourself for the best and worst dad jokes yet with our Dad Jokes 2024. They’re ready to make you groan and giggle at the same time.

Charm Her with a Laugh: The Best Dad Jokes to Tell a Girl!

1. Are you a magician? Because whenever I look at you, everyone else disappears.
2. If you were a fruit, you’d be a fine-apple.
3. Do you like raisins? How about a date?
4. Is your name Google? Because you’ve got everything I’m searching for.
5. Do you have Wi-Fi? Because I’m feeling a connection.
6. Are you a campfire? Because you’re hot and I want s’more.

Think you’re too tough to laugh at dad jokes? Think again! Our Funny Dad Jokes will break through your defenses and have you laughing out loud.

Quick Laughs: The Best One Liner Dad Jokes for Every Occasion!

1. I’m on a whiskey diet. I’ve lost three days already.
2. Parallel lines have so much in common. It’s a shame they’ll never meet.
3. What’s a pirate’s favorite letter? You think it’s R, but it be the C.
4. Why don’t ants get sick? Because they have tiny ant-bodies.
5. I used to play piano by ear. Now I use my hands.
6. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.

Counting Down the 10 Best Dad Jokes for Maximum Giggles!

1. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh.
2. How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
3. What’s brown and sticky? A stick.
4. Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
5. What did the big flower say to the little flower? Hey, bud!
6. Why did the chicken join a band? Because it had the drumsticks.
7. How do you organize a space party? You planet.
8. What do you call a dog that does magic tricks? A Labracadabrador.
9. What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, it just waved.
10. What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator.

Beat the Heat with the Best Summer Dad Jokes!

1. What’s a frog’s favorite summertime treat? Hopsicles.
2. Why do bananas use sunscreen? So they don’t peel.
3. Why did the sun go to school? To get a little brighter.
4. What’s the best way to watch a fly fishing tournament? Live stream.
5. How do we know the ocean is friendly? It waves.
6. Why was the math book so hot during summer? It had too many problems.

Short and Sweet: The Best Short Dad Jokes Ever!

1. What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.
2. I only know 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know y.
3. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
4. What’s a pirate’s favorite letter? Arrr!
5. Why did the scarecrow win an award? He was outstanding in his field.
6. What did one wall say to the other? I’ll meet you at the corner.

Knock Knock! Who’s There? The Best Dad Knock Knock Jokes!

1. Knock knock.
   Who’s there?
   Lettuce.
   Lettuce who?
   Lettuce in, it’s freezing out here!
2. Knock knock.
   Who’s there?
   Boo.
   Boo who?
   Don’t cry, it’s just a joke!
3. Knock knock.
   Who’s there?
   Cow says.
   Cow says who?
   No, cow says “moo”!
4. Knock knock.
   Who’s there?
   Broken pencil.
   Broken pencil who?
   Oh, never mind, it’s pointless.
5. Knock knock.
   Who’s there?
   Tank.
   Tank who?
   You’re welcome!
6. Knock knock.
   Who’s there?
   Atch.
   Atch who?
   Bless you!